RIP LARRY BIRD JOHNSON

at first i was sad cause i thought that the long rumored super hybrid of larry bird and larry johnson had finally been completed only to die, like a child with the heart of a baboon, much too soon and without the poignant poetry (poignantry?). Then i squinted more and saw the truth, this fecund beast of yore had not yet been girthed but had in firth been spake of a first lad! Now i have never hid the fact that LBJ is my fav prez, except when i insisted it was either nixon or rutherford b. or the gay one, but now that i am officially old, i have settled into the knowledge that the president who made a point of whizzing on the white house lawn in front of reporters gets a lifetime uno spot. his bitch was riddickulusly named and for this her fertile womb of privilege and repression shall be missed even though i could have sworn she died in like 95 or some shit, i mean she was fucking 94 for the love of anthony anderson. but alas i could spend all day relating the 93 other things that happened today but i have already cried 92 tears over it and well i am pieceing out of this bitch in roughly 91 blocks of 5 seconds.

ps also discovered while googling for images that larry johnson is also the name of some football asshole from the chiefs and that my beloved UNLVhornet was not alone. sucks. he only got one pic on the first page of results from g00gle. sad!